Mediation and Conflict Resolution     "You can't shake hands with a

                                          clenched fist."             -- Indira Gandhi

Mediation is a process in which a neutral third party (the mediator) facilitates the resolution of conflict involving two or more parties.

   Sometimes, parties are already in agreement as to how they would like their resolution to be. For example:

At other times, parties are in heated dispute.   For example:   

In either case, parties who are willing to dialogue about the issues are good candidates for mediation.

What are the steps of mediation?

Preliminary steps include a FREE CONSULTATION to determine is there is a good “fit” between the needs of the client and the services we provide. We spend time making sure the parties have a good understanding of the mediation process before we begin the formal steps.  The mediation style we use is Facilitative.

Step 1. Introductions and ground rules

Step 2. Both parties involved present their side of the story

Step 3. Issues are clarified, summarized and prioritized. Both parties need to understand each other’s needs.

Step. 4 Creative brainstorming of possible solutions.

Step 5. Narrowing range of options to best and most workable solution(s).

Step 6. Documentation of agreement and signing of agreement by both parties.

At times, a subsequent meeting is set up to determine how well the agreement is working. Because parties now know the process, they can also meet without the mediator as long as they follow these basic steps.

If at any point one or the other party refuses to continue the mediation, each party maintains the right to investigate the option of litigation.

What are the advantages of mediation?

• Parties make their own decisions
• Parties 85-90% more likely to abide by decisions they make
• Costs much less
• Takes much less time
• Communication is civil, respectful
• Personal and professional issues stay private

            By contrast in litigation...

• Attorneys make decisions
• Parties less likely to abide by decisions attorneys make
• Costs can be exorbitant
• Can go on for years
• Attorneys encourage sides only to “speak” through them
• Issues open to public record

Family and Elder Mediation

  In Family Mediation, family members hire a neutral third party to help them resolve disputes regarding any number of family matters. Issues might include:  

• Division of labor
• Parent/child conflict
• Teen issues
• House rules
• Blended family concerns
• Effective discipline

Family mediation is highly effective because:

• Participants have a say-so in the outcomes
• Parents don’t dominate the discussion
• All parties walk away with a sense of win-win
• Families learn how to communicate more effectively and respectfully
• A structured process allows participants to understand each other’s positions and negotiate workable plans.

     Elder Mediation is a form of Family Mediation generally involving seniors and their caregivers. Whether seniors still live at home or are now in a residential care facility, issues arise which can bring out heated family debate. Such issues may include:

• Driving
• Residence
• Living Will
• Estate matters
• Caregiver burnout
• Sibling disagreement
• Availability of community resources.

For a FREE ½ hour consultation to learn if mediation can work for your family, please contact us. Making difficult decisions that impact caregivers and senior family members can be gut-wrenching. We hope you allow us to assist you in sorting through matters that can be at times painful and soul-searching for all involved.

Northcoast Conflict Solutions received a 99% ranking in 2003 from Quality Care Options, a firm in Westlake, Ohio which rates eldercare specialists in the community and links them with families in need of elder services.

Faith-Based Mediation      Religious Conflict? A House Divided

Even in the holiest of places, people can be at odds with each other:

• Pastor vs. congregants
• Choir director vs. director of religious education
• School principal vs. pastor
• Bishop vs. diocesan splinter groups
• Elders vs. Council

Mediation can help:

• Teach peaceful dispute resolution methods
• Encourage spiritual growth during conflict
• Foster healthy relations for the future
• Respect everyone’s role and responsibility
• Halt further damage to your faith-based work

Customized Clergy Mediation Training

• This 1-day training gives you the basics of:
• Attitude toward conflict in faith-based ministries
• Definition and benefits of mediation
• Effective listening techniques
• 7-step mediation framework
• Demonstration, role play, discussion relative to faith-based conflicts in ministry
• Call (216) 236-6200 to book a regional, district, or local training

Human relationships are complex, even in the name of religion. Matthew’s Gospel warns that “ a house divided against itself will not stand ” (Mt. 12:25). And Jesus is clear in John’s Gospel that his desire for peace among his followers is so strong that “ a new command ” is given to love one another. In that way, we might distinguish ourselves as disciples from pagans who don’t know any better (Jn. 13:34-35).

Mediation helps those who stray and “promote controversies rather than God’s work” (1 Tim. 1:4) and blesses those who truly want to enter into a process of boldly practicing faith peacefully. “There is one God and one mediator between God and us, the man, Christ Jesus” (1 Tim. 2-5) who wants us “everywhere to lift up holy hands in prayer, without anger or disputing.” (1 Tim. 2:8)

Jesus’ prayer for us (John 17:11) is that in God’s name, we may be ONE. Not without differences or without conflict, but ultimately united in our faith which binds us to one another and to God. Our hope and our purpose are to use the creative power of conflict to help those in the church to resolve the differences that divide us, so that we may more fully express and live out the faith that unites us.